


Silverlining

by FaustusianSutcliff



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age 2, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Alternate Universe-Canon compliant, Angst, Casual Sex, M/M, Mpreg, Slight Canon Divergence, might go into inquisition, my attempt at slow build Zevran and Alistair, not super warden friendly, post landsmeet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-26
Updated: 2018-11-02
Packaged: 2018-11-19 09:26:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11310507
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FaustusianSutcliff/pseuds/FaustusianSutcliff
Summary: Alistair, feeling betrayed by the woman he loved, leaves the land meet and plans to drown in sorrows in the nearest tavern, but Zevran has other plans when he follows him. Together they leave and go to Kirkwall. Alistair finds his feelings for Zevran growing, while at the same time, falling in with one Wesely Hawke and co, and joining his expedition into the deep roads. It isn't until after Alistair leaves, Zevran finds out he's pregnant with Alistair's child, and things just seem to go worse from there.Follows some Canon and mostly takes place in the DAII universe, not Hero of Ferelden friendly, and might possibly veer off into the Inquisition.





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to add more tags as this goes along. Hope you enjoy it :) any questions about the mpreg I found a helpful diagram 
> 
>  
> 
> http://pre02.deviantart.net/8f29/th/pre/i/2012/330/c/5/male_pregnancy_developing_by_althea9-d5bsder.jpg

**One:**

The look of defeat and betrayal was written on Alistair’s face plain as day as Zevran watched their dear, though he used that term as loosely as possible now, simply tossed Alistair aside and turned to address the rest of the court, her hand resting on Loghain’s shoulder.

Zevran ignored the Warden’s call of his name and went after Alistair, and caught up with him just outside the castle gates. 

“Ali-” 

“What?” Alistair snarled as he whirled around to face Zevran. 

The anger and hurt in his voice made Zevran step back, a hand automatically going to the dagger at his hip. Alistair saw the motion and crossed his arms over his chest. 

“She tell you to kill me cause I won’t go along with her plan?” Alistair spat. 

“What? No!,” Zevran dropped his hands to his sides. “Her declaration was much of a surprise to me as to you.” 

Alistair snorted. “Yeah, right, you were all just conspiring against me weren’t you? Just waiting for the moment to kick out the wet blanket right?” 

“Alistair, I swear that I had no idea,” Zevran took a step forward. 

“And why should I believe you? You were sent to kill us,” Alistair reminded. “She finally agreed to..to sleep with you and you agreed to go along with her plan?” 

“At this moment, I am rather pleased I hadn’t slept with her,” Zevran admitted. “And, if you must know, she was sharing her tent with Leliana.”

“Lel...Leliana?” Alistair’s anger deflated as he swayed on his feet. “But...but she, I thought…” 

Zevran took another step forward and put his hand on Alistair’s shoulder to steady him. He hung his head and brushed Zevran’s hand off his shoulder. 

“I need a drink…” he mumbled and turned to start walking again. 

Zevran cast a backward glance at the castle before he fell into step with Alistair. The two walked in silence, Alistair with his eyes trained on the dirt road beneath them, Zevran with his eyes forward, scanning the trees and bushes around them in case the Warden did decide to kill Alistair, though he felt that was unlikely. 

No one cast a glance at them as they walked into the tavern, it was mostly empty and Alistair claimed a well-worn table in the back while Zevran got their drinks. Alistair gripped his cup like a lifeline and stared down at it. 

“All this time...she and...Leliana?” Alistair asked softly. “Even after she and I…” 

Zevran tried to pick his words carefully. “I suppose, she wanted to keep you unawares,” he told Alistair. “Looking back...I am sorry…” 

“Why are you apologizing? You said yourself you had nothing to do with it,” Alistair looked up at him. 

“No…” Zevran looked at his own cup now. “But I should have seen the signs as it were.” 

Alistair said nothing and brought his drink to his lips downing it in one go before the cup was set on the table. “I’m getting another.” 

Zevran nodded and watched him walk up to the bar and held up two fingers. He shifted to lean against the wall and brought his own drink to his lips and sip at what passed as decent in the taverns of Ferelden. 

Alistair sat back down with two cups this time, drinking both in quick succession. Zevran raised an eyebrow. 

“You’re really in no place to judge,” Alistair pointed out. 

Zevran chuckled. “You are not wrong there my friend. Though if you intend to keep drinking, you will need more coin than you have to pay for those drinks.” He dropped a small bag of coins on the table. 

“Where did you get that?” Alistair started to reach forward then paused. “Where were you keeping it?” 

Zevran smirked over the rim of his cup and laughed at the expression that crossed Alistair’s face. “Ah, you are far too easy. I did a little exploring during the duel, and I was keeping it in a perfectly respectable place.” 

“You and I have different definitions of respectable,” Alistair felt the need to point out. 

He reached for the coins again and paused as he closed his hand around the bag with a sigh. 

“Suppose drinking myself into a stupor isn’t going to do much is it?” he asked. 

Zevran shook his head and set his cup down. 

“I should leave Denerim,” Alistair added. “Soon as possible really.” 

“We should leave,” Zevran corrected. 

“We?” Alistair looked at him. 

“I can not to return to the Crows with a failed bounty on my head,” Zevran answered. “And, given that I have left our dear Warden, my debt to her is forfeit.” 

Alistair looked at the bag of coins. “We could go to Kirkwall...lots of...refugees are going there to flee the blight, might be our best chance to get lost.” 

Zevran nodded in agreement and finished his drink. “Then we rest tonight and in the morning, we plan.” 

Alistair took a few coins out of the bag and pushed the rest towards Zevran. “You get a room, I’m going to...have a few more drinks.” 

Zevran started to protest but the look on Alistair’s face left room for a winning argument. He paid for a room and mentioned it to Alistair as he went upstairs. By the time Alistair stumbled into the room, the candles Zevran had lit had gone down considerably making the room almost dark. 

He listened to Alistair stumble around the room discarding his armor while trying to be quiet, swear a few times before he began to get into the bed. Zevran rolled over and was met with Alistair’s back, his shoulder’s began to shake, a few choked sobs breaking the silence of the room. 

Zevran put his hand on Alistair’s shoulder and the man tensed next to him, though his shoulders still shook every so often as he tried to even his breathing. 

“It is alright,” Zevran murmured. 

Alistair’s answer was to roll over, and wrap both arms around Zevran, his head pressed into the crook of Zevran’s neck. Zevran brought one hand up and carded his fingers through Alistair’s hair until the man cried himself to sleep. 

* * *

Zevran woke up before Alistair the next morning, well before the sun had breached the clouds. Alistair had rolled onto his back, one arm thrown loosely over Zevran’s waist. Zevran carefully slipped out of bed and dressed, he sheathed his daggers and pulled on his cloak.

The walk back to the castle didn’t give much time to think, though he was set on going with Alistair, no matter where the other man would want to go. And if he wanted to go to Kirkwall, Zevran would go with him to Kirkwall. 

Zevran easily snuck back into the rooms at the castle and hid around the corner as he heard voices coming from the opposite direction. 

“Do you think it is wise to let Alistair run off like that?”

_ Ah, Morrigan.  _

Zevran didn’t exactly always care for her, or her treatment of Alistair. He moved a little closer to try and hear better. 

“What harm could Alistair do? He couldn’t even decide to lead the Warden’s, he left that up to me,” the warden scoffed. 

“It isn’t about the harm, but rather more what he can do for you,” Morrigan answered. “You said yourself, only a warden can kill an archdemon, do you want to be the one to strike the killing blow?” 

“I know you didn’t really like Alistair but, trying to convince him to make the killing blow on the Archdemon is a bit much,” the Warden replied. 

“Well, there is another way….” Morrigan’s voice faded as they walked down the hall. 

Zevran crept down the hall in the opposite direction towards the rooms he and Alistair had been in during their brief stay at the castle. He grabbed their packs, he hadn’t really unpacked his belongings, and Alistair’s were set aside neatly so it made it quick. 

He ducked back into the hall and stayed in the shadows as he backtracked to the way he’d come in. He stopped just outside the door of their room in the tavern when he heard voices, the door swung open with Alistair white-knuckling the doorknob and Anora standing opposite him. 

“Alistair, please,” Anora stepped forward. 

“I don’t know what you hoped to accomplish,” Alistair said with more steel in his voice than Zevran had ever heard. “But I suggest that you leave.” 

Anora took another step forward, then turned on her heel with hardly a glance towards Zevran. Alistair didn’t seem to notice him, but he left the door open and walked back towards the bed, he sat down with his arms resting on his thighs and his fingers threading into his hair. 

Zevran made sure to make his steps noticeable and shut the door behind him. He set their packs by the door and walked up to Alistair. 

“She tried to convince me to come back,” Alistair said to break the silence. “That we could get married, and I could help her rule.” 

“King Alistair, does have a nice ring to it does it not?” Zevran sat next to him. “Do you...want to go back?” 

“No...but, what am I supposed to do in Kirkwall? As far as the world’s concerned, the Grey Warden’s turned on the king,” Alistair answered. 

“You do not have to tell people you are a Grey Warden,” Zevran pointed out. “And unless the Warden decides to go around telling everyone what you look like, that will not be a problem, no?” 

“Still doesn’t tell me what I should do for work,” Alistair pointed out. 

“The city guard is always looking is it not?” Zevran asked. “With your military experience, I am sure you will be a fine candidate.” 

“And if I work in the city guard, how am I going to make sure you stay out of trouble?” Alistair asked. “I highly doubt they’re going to let an ex-crow join their ranks.” 

“You wound me,” Zevran feigned hurt. 

Alistair sighed. “Well, if Anora managed to find us this easily, this means we should probably get going. I talked to one of the ship captains last night, and he’s willing to take us to Kirkwall for a few coins. Doesn’t leave ‘til later so we’ve got a few hours to kill.” 

“A few hours? What shall we do until then?” Zevran asked.

He lied back on the bed and turned his head to look at Alistair. The blond was staring down at him and biting his lower lip. Zevran raised an eyebrow. 

“Can I...Can I hold you?” he asked. “I just...nothing has to happen, I just...forget I said anything. It’s stupid.” 

“It is not stupid, come, lay down,” Zevran crawled back on the bed and laid down. “Would you prefer I face you, or the window?” 

“The uh...the window…” Alistair answered as he started to lay down next to Zevran. 

Zevran rolled over onto his side and felt Alistair move a little closer, then put a tentative arm around Zevran’s waist. Zevran closed his eyes and shifted a little closer. Alistair tensed for a brief second before he relaxed. 

“How do you always smell so nice?” Alistair asked. “We’ve spent nearly a year sleeping in tents, and the woods and near maker knows what, killing darkspawn and other gross things...and you still smell like flowers and leather.” 

“Antivan leather,” Zevran smiled. 

“Right, right, how could I forget the Antivan leather,” Alistair chuckled. He adjusted his hold on Zevran, idly stroking the piece of flesh revealed from his shirt having rucked up. “Thanks, for...thanks for being here Zevran. I know we haven’t exactly gotten along, but uh, having you here, it’s nice.” 

“It seems we do agree on certain things,” Zevran chuckled. 

Alistair shifted around a little bit and until he could tuck his face in the crook of Zevran’s neck. “I mean it Zevran...Thank you.” 


	2. Chapter 2

**Two**

Alistair woke up with a choked gasp and squeezed his eyes shut as images of the archdemon swam around in his head. He was careful not to jostle Zevran to much as he climbed out of their bunk and stumbled over to the small basin of water in the corner. 

He splashed a bit of water on his face before he made his way out of the room and onto the deck. Part of him felt bad, that he and Zevran were able to secure one of the last rooms on board, but the other part was just a little bit pleased if only so he could keep Zevran just that much closer. 

Alistair made his way over to the railing of the deck and braced his arms on the wood. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. 

“Couldn’t sleep either?” 

He looked over his shoulder as another man walked over to stand next to him. Alistair stayed quiet. 

“Never been on a ship before, all this rocking, almost got a second viewing of whatever it is they called food,” he continued. 

Alistair chuckled despite himself. 

“So you have a sense of humor, that’s good. Do you have a name?” the man asked. 

“....Alistair,” Alistair answered. 

“Alistair...Well, Alistair, I’m Wesley….But most people call me Hawke,” he offered his hand and Alistair straightened up to shake it. “Your accent, you from Ferelden too?” 

“Yeah…” Alistair nodded. “Denerim...couldn't stay though.” 

Hawke nodded. “I’m from Lothering...or...was…” he gave Alistair a wry smile. 

“You’re not anymore?” Alistair asked. 

“My younger brother was one of the soldiers fighting at Ostagar...after the Warden’s, well I’m sure you know what happened, he came to warn us and we’ve been running ever since...last I heard, Lothering’s gone….” Hawke sighed and leaned back on the railing. “Bethany’s gone…”

“Bethany?” Alistair asked. 

“My sister,” Hawke answered. “She uh...she died trying to protect us, an orge, things are massive…” 

“Oh, I’m sorry…” Alistair put a hand on Hawke’s shoulder. “Losing family...not the greatest feeling in the world.” 

“What about you? Lone wolf?” Hawke asked.

“Not exactly lone wolf type,” Alistair chuckled and dropped his hand. “I’m going to Kirkwall with a friend. He’s sleeping right now.” 

“Oh, oh I see,” Hawke chuckled. 

“See, oh, oh maker no, it’s not like that,” Alistair blushed. 

“Hey, no judgment here,” Hawke smiled a bit. “Gotta find happiness where we can right? I should get back, it was nice meeting you Alistair, maybe we’ll see each other around Kirkwall.” 

Alistair smiled a bit. “If we do, I’ll buy us some drinks.” 

“I’ll hold you to that,” Hawke chuckled as he walked away. 

Alistair stayed on the deck awhile longer, until it got a little too cold for him. He walked back to the room and climbed back under the covers. 

“Was it another dream?” Zevran rolled over to look at Alistair. “The Archdemon?” 

Alistair faltered a little bit, a lie forming on his tongue, but he nodded. “I didn’t wake you did I?” 

“It is alright,” Zevran sat up a little. “Are you alright?” 

“No,” Alastair laid down his back. “But I knew what I was in for when I was conscripted into the Wardens. The...sacrifices, and dreams. But hey, if I ever go to the deep roads again, I’ll be able to sense the bastards....” 

_ Gotta find happiness where we can…. _

“Can I kiss you?” Alistair turned his head to look at Zevran. 

Zevran laughed softly. “A kiss? Such interesting places your mind goes to…” 

“Sorry...I know, I just…” Alistair covered his face with one hand. “Forget I said anything.” 

“No, no, do not hide,” Zevran replied. He tugged at Alistair’s hand until he could see his face, and leaned over him slightly. He leaned down and brushed his lips against Alistair's.

Alistair reached up with his free hand to cup the side of Zevran’s face and kissed back. It was so different than kissing  _ her.  _ Zevran’s lips were slightly chapped, and it was a man’s weight pressing against Alistair, but it was, nicer. 

Zevran was the first to pull away and he looked down at Alistair. “Is it everything you had hoped it would be?” 

“It was nice,” Alistair answered. “I mean, I don’t go around kissing other men so I have nothing to compare it to.” 

“So that makes me your first?” Zevran asked as he laid back down. “No, experimentation when you were with your fellow templars?” 

“Chantry boy remember?” Alistair joked as he wrapped an arm around Zevran. “Chock full of innocence.” 

“I bet you are not as innocent as you claim my dear Alistair,” Zevran yawned. “You are a soldier after all.” 

“What does me being a soldier have to do with anything?” Alistair frowned. “Zevran…? Zevran?” He sat up a little and did not pout when he saw Zevran already asleep. 

“What does being a warrior and innocence have to do with anything?” he mumbled. 

* * *

“Maker, land at last, I thought we going to grow old on that ship,” Alistair said as he and Zevran stepped off the ship. “You must’ve been out of your mind when you came over from Antiva.” 

“I found ways to amuse myself,” Zevran scanned the crowds in front of the gates. “Our troubles are not over yet...I do not think the guards are letting people into the city.” 

“What? That’s crazy?” Alistair frowned. “Come on.” 

“I do not think that is a wise idea….” Zevran crossed his arms over his chest and looked around. “Ah, follow me.” 

“What?” Alistair looked over confused as he watched Zevran wait before making his way over to where a group of ship-hands had been picking up crates and carrying them through a side gate. “Oh…” 

He cast another look at the crowd of people before he went after Zevran and copied him in picking up a crate, and keeping his head low as they fell into step with the other ship hands. He didn’t release the breath he’d been holding until they were past the gates. 

“...That was easier than expected…” Alistair said as he set his crate down. “What do we do now?” 

“We will need to find someplace to live no?” Zevran asked. 

“Lowtown is probably our best bet,” Alistair answered. “We can use the rest of the money for food and things until I can find some work…” 

"We find some work,” Zevran corrected. “Unless you plan to just keep me around to look pretty.” 

“Where do you intend to find work?” Alistair asked. 

“Big city like this? There is bound to be a place for those wishing to..let off some steam,” Zevran answered. 

“What? No,” Alistair shook his head. “As your friend, I can not let you do that, you could catch something…” 

“I do not have many options as an elf,” Zevran pointed out. 

“Look, don’t...don’t jump to selling yourself so fast alright?” Alistair said. “Please?” 

“Alright,” Zevran nodded a little. “But we should find someplace to stay...Perhaps the local tavern will have a room or two?” 

“Right...just have to figure out where it is,” Alistair agreed. “That won’t be hard at all….” 

“Think of it as a new adventure,” Zevran smiled. “It will be fun yes? And there is no Morrigan, so that is a plus.” 

“And hey, no swooping,” Alistair smiled back. “Or darkspawn.” 

“Things are already looking up,” Zevran grinned as they began to walk. 


	3. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alistair finally meets the rest of Hawke's Co. and agrees to help fund and join in on the expedition to the deep roads.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally going to attempt to finish this story lol.

**Three**

“Zevran, there’s something that I need to tell you….Zevran, I kinda did something stupid, for a good reason…” Alistair trailed off with a groan and dropped his head on the bar counter. 

“Alistair?” 

Alistair turned his head and sat up a little. “Hawke?” 

“What are you doing here?” Hawke grinned as he walked over. 

“Sort of lost my job because I wouldn’t kill a guard,” Alistair answered. “You’ve been making a name for yourself, or so I’ve heard.” 

Hawke shrugged. “Lost your job huh?” 

“I was working for a smuggler for a while, but I’ve got this moral thing that keeps me from killing the city guards,” Alistair chuckled. 

“You know...I might be able to help you…” Hawke told him as he sat down. “My brother and I were just about to talk to a friend about an expedition into the deep roads. All we need is about 50 gold coins and we’d be partners. Supposed to be full of untapped riches.” 

Alistair snorted. “There is nothing in the deep roads but darkspawn and brood mothers,” he shuddered. 

“You’ve been in the deep roads?” Hawke asked. 

Alistair swore under his breath and nodded. “Yeah...I uh….”  _ I was fighting alongside the hero of ferelden and we went in the deep roads to try and find some guys, possible wife.  _ “Part of the reason I left Denerim...some friends of mine died during a job we had to do…”

“That’s great,” Hawke grinned. “I mean, not that you’re friends died...but that you’ve been in the Deep Roads. Look, you don’t need to give me an answer now, but think about it alright?”

Alistair nodded. 

“Great, I’m usually here most nights, so when you’ve got your answer, just come here okay?” Hawke told him as he started to back away. 

Alistair paid for his last drink and stood up. He made his way out of the Hanged Man and towards his and Zevran’s small home in Low Town. It was weird to think he had a place to call home again, let alone a home he shared with Zevran, though his fondness for the ex-assassin had grown over the past year. 

His mouth watered instantly as he stepped into the home, the smell of fish and potatoes wafting out the door. He shut the door behind him alerting Zevran of his presence and he was met with a grin. 

“Ah, just in time,” Zevran tilted his head in the direction of the table. “Would you get the bowls? I made some fish and potatoes stew, and I managed to charm the baker into a loaf of fresh bread.”

“How’d you manage that?” Alistair asked. 

“Why with my amazing whit,” Zevran answered. “And, I took care of a little problem they were having.” 

“Define little?” Alistair asked. 

“I helped to set some traps, I know how jealous you get when I use my other skills on other people,” Zevran teased as Alistair walked over with the bowls. 

“I don’t get jealous…” Alistair huffed. 

“I like it,” Zevran said as he took one of the bowls. “Now, why do you look so worried?” 

“I sort of got let go from my job…because I wouldn’t kill a city guard, but that uh, that guy I mentioned, Hawke, he’s planning this expedition into the Deep Roads, and he mentioned he’s looking for a few more people to go in on it with him…” Alistair answered. 

“The Deep Roads? Is this something you want to do?” Zevran asked. 

He filled the first bowl and gave it back to Alistair before taking the second and filling it as well. 

“I don’t know…” Alistair said. “He didn’t really say much, but, apparently they’re supposed to find a great deal of treasure. And...we do still have some of the money left we took from her right? Unless you think it’s a stupid idea.” 

“I do not think you should say yes until you have more of the facts,” Zevran answered. “And you know how much you are getting.” 

“Go with me then? To talk to him about it? He spends most of his nights at the Hanged Man,” Alistair told him. 

“I will be working at the Blooming Rose for the next few nights, we could meet with him after?” Zevran offered. 

Alistair nodded. “You’re still just working the bar right?” 

Zevran chuckled. “Yes, I’m still just working the bar. You have nothing to worry about my dear Warden.” 

Alistair blushed a little as Zevran finished filling the bowls and carried his own back to the small table. There were a few slices of bread on a small plate and Alistair tore a piece off. Zevran got a look Alistair couldn’t decipher in his eyes as he watched Alistair dip the bread into the soup but it was gone just as soon as it had shown. 

“So you would not kill a city guard?” Zevran asked. 

Alistair shook his head. “No...it was that one guard, Donnic, I think.” 

“Ah, the one that stepped in during an altercation at the docks yes?” Zevran smiled a little. “I am glad you did not kill him. Truthfully, I did not enjoy seeing you work for that smuggler.” 

“It wasn’t to bad,” Alistair shrugged. “At least, we were just killing more bad guys…” 

“But I know you did not enjoy it,” Zevran pointed out. 

“The money was decent though,” Alistair sighed. “Probably won’t be able to buy meat for a while...I could go down to the docks, or something and try to catch some fish for now…” 

“I suppose it will be fish stew for a while then,” Zevran mused. 

* * *

 

“Alistair, relax,” Zevran put his hand on Alistair’s shoulder. 

“Maybe this was stupid,” Alistair shook his head. 

“You said yourself he could use a grey warden,” Zevran pointed out. “You will be a good asset for them, and you are already tainted by the darkspawn blood so no need to worry about it harming you.” 

“I’m not sure that counts as a good thing,” Alistair pointed out but smiled a bit. “Not going to accomplish anything standing out here are we?”

“Come, I will buy you a drink while you find this Hawke fellow,” Zevran said as he grabbed Alistair’s hand. 

Zevran disappeared to the bar as soon as they were inside, and Alistair was left standing in the doorway until a few patrons shoved past him to get inside. It didn’t take long to find Hawke, all the way in the back of the tavern, his voice, and laughter, carrying across the room. 

He was seated at a large table with a few other people. A younger man with an almost similar appearance, he assumed that to be Hawke’s brother. A dwarf with...pretty nice chest hair actually, and no beard, two elves, one with strange markings on his arms, and the other, a young woman who reminded Alistair of the Dalish clan they had helped a year ago, and a slightly older woman with red hair that he had seen patrolling around. 

“Alistair!” Hawke smiled and jumped up when he spotted him. “You made it, we’re just finishing up a game of Wicked Grace while we wait for Isabela and Anders. Pull up a chair. Move over Carver.” 

The younger man, Carver, muttered something under his breath but moved to sit next to the elven woman and Alistair grabbed a chair for himself and one for Zevran. 

“This was the guy I was telling you about, the one who’s been in the deep roads before,” Hawke continued. “Alistair, this is Varric,” he motioned to the dwarf at the head of the table, “My younger brother Carver, the newly appointed Guard Captain Aveline, Fenris, and Merrill. Isabela went to get Anders from Darktown. He’s a former Grey Warden and he has some maps that we can use to find an entrance into the Deep Roads.” 

_ Andraste’s ass, another Grey Warden?  _

“Ah, there you are, I was looking for you,” Zevran’s voice saved Alistair from bolting as he appeared at his elbow with two drinks. “Aren’t you going to introduce me to this group of colorful people?” 

“R...Right…” Alistair took one of the drinks and took a healthy swig. 

“Hawke. Wesley Hawke,” Hawke said before Alistair could say anything. 

Alistair fought back a frown at Hawke’s open roving gaze over Zevran, and the obvious interest he saw in his eyes. 

“Ow, what the hell Carver?” Hawke frowned. 

“Keep it in your pants for once brother,” Carver said. 

Zevran chuckled. 

“That’s my little brother Carver,” Hawke said with emphasis on the little earning a glare from Carver. “This is Varric, that’s Fenris and Merrill and Aveline. We’re just waiting on-” 

“Zevran?” 

Alistair raised a curious eyebrow as Zevran straightened significantly and spun on his heel. 

“Isabela! My favorite pirate wench,” Zevran grinned. “I thought you were going to be sailing the high seas?” 

“I was for a while, caught a bad storm and crashed here in Kirkwall. What about you? I thought you were-”

“I was, things,  _ changed _ ,” Zevran interrupted smoothly. 

“I’m Anders…” the man behind Isabela said with a small wave. “Just in case anyone’s wondering…” 

A series of unspoken communication seemed to pass between Isabela and Zevran before she whisked him off to a pair of chairs, leaving Alistair to sit between Aveline and Anders. 

Alistair did his best to listen as best as he could, the guard, Aveline, kept glancing at him from the corner of her eye, as did Anders. It wasn’t til after they all finished talking, and Alistair wanted to leave, but Zevran had disappeared with Isabela to do Maker knows what. 

“You look familiar,” Carver said as he walked over. “Like I’ve seen you before.” 

“I get that a lot,” Alistair replied. “Just have one of those faces you know?” 

Carver didn’t look too convinced and started to speak when Merrill showed up at his elbow. 

“Carver, would you mind walking me home? I still get lost making my way back to the alienage sometimes,” she said. 

“Oh...Oh yeah sure,” Carver smiled a bit. 

Alistair slipped away from the group and made his way back to the bar for a stronger drink. He ran a hand through his hair and sighed. 

“Hawke told me you’ve been in the Deep Roads before.” 

Alistair looked up and saw Anders leaning against the bar next to him.  “Uh, yeah, for a job back in Denerim...Hawke mentioned that you’re a Grey Warden?” 

Anders nodded. “I got conscripted back in Amaranthine, with a couple other people...suppose that's how most Warden’s get made though. I uh, I wound up leaving, the Warden there, don’t get me wrong she was great, but…” Anders shrugged. “In any case, it’s nice to know I won’t be the only one dreading all the Darkspawn if you decide to join us.” 

Alistair chuckled a bit and nodded. “Couldn’t take a piss without running into one down there.”

“Ah, the sound of laughter,” Zevran smiled as he joined them. “Does this mean we will help fund the expedition?” 

“Maker, I don’t know,” Alistair sighed. 

“I’ll leave you two to talk,” Anders said as he walked away. 

“You are good at killing darkspawn no?” Zevran asked. 

“I’ll be gone for...for weeks Zevran,” Alistair answered. 

“I could go with you,” Zevran answered. 

“No. Absolutely not, it’s a miracle that you didn’t already catch the blight sickness, we are not going to tempt fate,” Alistair shook his head. 

“Then, you will go and I will stay here,” Zevran answered. “I think doing this will be good for you.” 

“You think so?” Alistair asked. 

“I do,” Zevran set their pouch of coins between them. “You must spend money to make money no?” 

Alistair reached for the coin and nodded. “Here goes nothing.” He walked back up to where Hawke was playing another game of Wicked Grace with Varric and Isabela. He cleared his throat to get their attention. 

“Hey uh...I’m in if you’re still looking for another person,” Alistair said as he set the pouch on the table. 

Hawke set down his cards and picked up the pouch. His raised an eyebrow at the weight and his eyes went a little wide. 

“Maker, this is, this is more than….are you sure you want to put this much in?” Hawke asked. 

“You’ve got to spend money to make money…” Alistair answered. “And, this is apparently supposed to bring in a lot of money so…” he shrugged. “Plus, your friend Ander’s doesn’t seem to keen on going in the Deep Roads again.” 

“You won’t regret this, I promise,” Hawke grinned. “With this, we’ve got a little extra, so I think a little drinking is in order.” 

“With you Hawke, it’s never a little drinking,” Varric chuckled. 

* * *

“I can’t believe I’m actually going into the deep roads again,” Alistair laughed as he and Zevran stumbled through the door. “You don’t think there will be any Broodmother’s down there do you?” 

“If there are, I feel terrible for you my dear warden,” Zevran smiled. 

Alistair grabbed Zevran’s hand and pulled him in close. “Oddly enough, I feel excited about the whole thing. I didn’t mean to get so...serious about you going. I just, I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you too.” 

“Oh, I’m sure you’d be fine,” Zevran shrugged and started to pull away. 

“No...No I wouldn’t,” Alistair tightened his grip on Zevran’s hand. “Zevran, this past year, I’d either be dead, or drinking myself to death if you hadn’t come with me, but you, you’ve kept me going and I appreciate that.” 

“You are my friend Alistair, I take no great pleasure in watching you suffer,” Zevran told him. 

Alistair dropped his gaze to Zevran’s lips, and then looked at him again. “You don’t ever think about being more?” He bent his head down and brushed his lips against Zevran’s, and when Zevran didn’t pull away, he dropped his hand to wrap his arm around Zevran’s waist and deepened the kiss. 

“Wait, wait,” Zevran pulled away and swallowed. “Are...are you sure you wish to do this?” 

“I’ve wanted to do this since that night on the ship to Kirkwall,” Alistair admitted. “But, seeing the way Hawke looked at you, and Isabela touching you...I want to be the only one to look at you like that, and touch you that way.” 

“And what way is that, my dear Alistair?” Zevran asked softly. 

“I guess I’ll just have to show you,” Alistair answered. 

He bit his lip a little smug at the surprised gasp he got from Zevran in response to Alistair picking him up by his thighs, and Zevran wrapping his legs around Alistair’s waist. He carried him into the next room and lowered him onto the makeshift bed. 

  
  



	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little filler chapter in which the boys take a little time before the expedition and think about what they'll do with their new found riches

**Four**

“What’s this?” Zevran leaned in the doorway and took in the pieces of armor scattered on the floor of the small bedroom. 

“If I’m going into the deep roads, I need to make sure my armor’s still good,” Alistair answered. “I never thought I’d be wearing it again…or...using this either.” He picked up the sword lying next to him and held it pointing towards the ceiling. “I’ll need to sharpen it again…” 

“I could still go with you…” Zevran mused. “Keep you warm in those cold caves, massage your sword arm...massage other parts of your body?” 

“Tempting,” Alistair said as he turned to look at him. “But no, I don’t have the recipe for a joining ritual and if you were to get sick...I much rather you stay here,” he leaned in and kissed him. “Where I know you’re safe, away from darkspawn, and can’t distract me.” 

“Oh, so I am distracting now?” Zevran smirked. 

“Extremely,” Alistair nodded as he reached forward to tug Zevran into his lap. “I should be sharpening my sword you know?” He slid his hand under Zevran’s shirt. “Making sure my armor is in good shape.” 

“You’ve been staring at your armor and sword since you pulled it out this morning,” Zevran mused as he wrapped his arms around Alistair’s neck. “Come with me to the market? I was thinking we could have something with cheese for dinner and you are the expert.” 

“Can we even afford that?” Alistair frowned. 

“I think we can afford it just this once,” Zevran told him. “Unless you no longer like cheese?” 

“How could you even say such a thing?” Alistair gasped. 

“Then come help me pick some up hmm?” Zevran started to stand up and held his hands out to Alistair. 

* * *

“We could buy a mansion in Hightown,” Alistair whispered in Zevran’s shoulder. “With a big enough yard for a mabari.” 

“Hmm?” Zevran shifted a little. 

“With our share of the treasure,” Alistair said. “People love mabari hounds, or...or I could put my military training to use. Teach people how to defend themselves. Or maybe I could join the city guard.” 

“And what shall I do?” Zevran asked. 

The curiosity and wonder seeping to Alistair’s voice, made Zevran think back to when they had first met, to the naive soldier, he had always teased, the easy laughter. It made him smile to himself to see it slowly coming back. 

“Well, you would stop working at the Blooming Rose,” Alistair answered. “What is something you’ve always wanted to do?” 

“I do not know,” Zevran admitted after a moment of silence. “My life has belonged to the Crows for as long as I can remember...then it belonged to the Warden so to speak...and now…Perhaps I will have an answer for you when you come back.” 

Alistair reached up and ran his fingers over Zevran’s tattoo, and cupped his cheek. “Is it selfish of me to say that I hope, whatever it is you want to do...we can stay together.” 

“It is alright to be selfish,” Zevran smiled. “You have spent far too long being unselfish do you not think?” 

The bed creaked under their weight as Alistair rolled Zevran onto his back and stared down at him. 

“Then I’m going to spend these next few weeks being as selfish as possible,” Alistair stated as he leaned down to kiss Zevran. 

Zevran reached up to thread his fingers in Alistair’s hair and moaned into the kiss as Alistair pressed against him. He reached between them and stroked Zevran slowly at first, making his breath hitch with each movement. 

Alistair reached behind them blindly for the oil they kept on hand, he sat up briefly to coat his hand and fingers in the oil, bypassing Zevran’s length as he pressed a finger against Zevran’s hole and rubbed gently to loosen the tight ring of muscles. 

Zevran pulled him down into another kiss, his fingers digging into Alistair's shoulders now as he began to thrust his fingers to stretch him. He pulled his fingers out gently and poured more oil into his hand. He pushed the sheets down and spread Zevran’s legs. 

Alistair took a few deep breaths to keep himself calm as he eased into Zevran. Zevran wrapped a leg around Alistair’s waist and groaned softly as Alistair started to pull out and thrust back in. Zevran’s fingers dug into his shoulders as he began to pick up speed. 

His name came out breathy from Zevran’s mouth as he struck the bundle of nerves that caused Zevran to clench around him every so often. Neither lasted very long after that with Alistair coming first, thrusting through his climax. 

He reached between them and started to stroke Zevran in time with his thrusts until he climaxed. 

“Stay…” Zevran pulled him back when Alistair started to get up. 

Alistair pulled the sheets back up to cover them and wrapped his arms around Zevran. 

“You aren’t to run off with all those untold riches are you?” Zevran murmured. “Find yourself someone else to share it with?” 

“Of course not Zevran...I...Of course, I’m going to come back and share the money with you,” Alistair promised.  _ I...I think I love you... _

“Good. Because it is to easy to track you,” Zevran smiled. 

“Shut up and go to sleep,” Alistair rolled his eyes and sat up long enough to blow out the last candle. 


	5. Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Our merry band of misfits has made it into the deep roads, while up top, Zevran finds out some big news!

**Five**

“Alistair! I thought you were going to back out on me at the last second,” Hawke smiled relieved. 

“Ah, that would be my fault,” Zevran apologized. “I was not feeling well and Alistair didn’t want to leave until I felt better.” 

“Are you ready to go or not?” another dwarf said as he walked over. 

“Relax Bartrand, it’s not like all the treasure is going anywhere,” Varric said. “You two better get your goodbyes in now before Bartrand has a fit.” 

“Right...right,” Alistair nodded. 

“One day we will get complete sentences out of him,” Zevran teased as he led Alistair aside. “Brasca, I can hear you thinking.” 

“You can not,” Alistair chuckled. “Kiss for luck?”

Zevran took a step forward and leaned up as Alistair leaned in to meet him in a kiss. “You better come back, my dear Warden.” He murmured. “Or I shall have to scour the deep roads for you myself.” 

“I’ll make sure to leave a trail for you to follow,” Alistair said as he pulled back. 

He picked up his pack and took a deep breath. “Let’s pray to the maker this isn’t for nothing.” 

Zevran hung back as he watched Alistair join Hawke, Carver, Varric, and Fenris with the rest of Bartrand’s company. He smiled, as Alistair looked back one last time and gave a small wave, and waved back. 

“He’s in good hands you know.” 

“I know,” Zevran said as he turned to look at Isabela. “Though, I am not so sure I trust the Bartrand fellow.” He grimaced and swallowed down the bile that threatened to crawl up his throat again. 

“Are you feeling alright?” She frowned and took a step closer to put a hand on his shoulder. 

“I just need to sit down, that is all,” Zevran said as he tried to brush off her concern. 

“Anders,” Isabela put an arm around Zevran as she called for the Grey Warden. 

“Is something the matter?” Anders asked. 

“I am fine, Isabela is worrying for nothing,” Zevran answered. 

“Andraste's tits I’m worrying for nothing,” Isabela said. “You look like you’re going to be sick.” 

“She’s not wrong,” Anders said kneeling in front of him. He put his hand on Zevran’s forehead and then cheeks. “You don’t feel like you have a fever...Do you think you can make it to Darktown? I can give you a better exam there, and mix something to help you feel better.” 

“Really that is not trouble,” Zevran started to protest. 

“Either you go willingly, I’ll go and get Aveline and have her knock you out and we all carry you there,” Isabela said. “You’re choice.” 

“You’ve become bossy…” Zevran said as he carefully stood up. “It may be a longer walk than intended..but I think I can make it.” 

The walk was indeed long, Zevran did not get sick, though the urge presented itself numerous times. Anders had Zevran lie down on one of the cots, Isabela stood close by. 

“Have you been feeling like this for very long?” Anders asked. “Or did it just start.” 

“I suppose I have been feeling a bit under the weather for the last few weeks, though it has only been an issue this morning...ah and yesterday morning,” he frowned. “And the morning before that…” 

“Is it just nausea? Or have you been eating more? Feeling...tender in certain places?” Anders asked. 

“I hadn’t really thought about that til now…” Zevran admitted. “But I suppose.” 

“Mhmm…” Anders nodded as a blue glow started to engulf his hands and he let them hover over Zevran’s body. 

“Zevran...you and Alistair are in a relationship right?” Anders asked as he lowered his hands. 

“I suppose so yes,” Zevran nodded. 

“Well, given the symptoms that you have told me, and what I sensed...I’m fairly certain you’re with child…” Anders answered. 

“No, no that should not be possible,” Zevran said as he sat up. “Wardens are supposed to be next to sterile.” 

“Well yes, how do you know that? And what does that have to do with Alistair?” Anders frowned. “Are you two...Grey Wardens?” 

Zevran swore under his breath at his mistake. “I am no Grey Warden...but Alistair...Alistair is a Grey Warden…he and I were with the Hero of Ferelden for a while. I am a former Crow and my masters accepted a contract on their lives, I was the lucky one who got the task, thanks to my good looks and wonderful charm, the Warden spared me and in exchange, I joined her and Alistair...As she and Alistair were Wardens, I didn’t feel the need to take my teas...I suppose that was foolish of me, given how the relationship with Alistair turned. You are certain?” 

“Anders is one of the best healers I’ve ever met,” Isabela said. “If he says, it’s probably true.” 

“Andraste’s flaming knickers...what happened?” Anders asked. “How did you two wind up all the way in Kirkwall?” 

“Our dear warden revealed her true colors at the landsmeet,” Zevran answered. “She chose not to kill Loghain, and indeed spared his life, Alistair left and I...went with him. He loved her, and he would have drunk himself into an early grave.” 

“You like him,” Isabela smiled as she sat next to Zevran. 

“He would not have survived on his own,” Zevran scoffed. 

“Oh please, you could have stayed with the Warden,” Isabela said. “Or left and gone out on your own, but you liked him long before you started sleeping together.” 

“And now he is in the Deep Roads and I’m…” Zevran trailed off with a small chuckle. “Your Maker has some sense of humor.” 

“There is something I can give you...if you’re just finding out, Alistair doesn’t have to know, unless you intend to tell him,” Anders said. “Unless you need a little time to think?” 

“Think…” Zevran nodded. “Thinking seems like a good idea. Isabela, would you perhaps care to walk me back? How much for the checkup?” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Anders told him. “I’m not doing this for the money, everyone needs to be able to get medical attention, even if they have no money. For now, I can give you something to help with nausea.”

“I appreciate it…” Zevran replied as he stood up. 

Isabela linked arms with him after Anders gave him a few elixirs and they started to make their way back to Low Town. 

* * *

 

Alistair felt suddenly invigorated as they trekked through the deep roads. This was what he was meant to do, this is why he went through the Joining. To fight and kill darkspawn. 

Not that they hadn’t fought any darkspawn, Alistair was making sure of that. It helped that they all thought the Deep Roads empty for the most part, now that The Blight was finished. Hawke kept up a running commentary with Varric. 

Fenris was surprisingly more talkative than Alistair had initially thought. Though it was sparse when he did talk.

He glanced over his shoulder, everyone had gotten quiet once they had gone off on their own to find a way around the cave in. They were also looking for Bohan’s son, and Maker was Alistair glad that the older dwarf hadn’t recognized him. 

Alistair turned to look straight ahead and froze as he sensed a group of darkspawn up ahead. There wasn’t any way around it and he tightened his grip on the hilt of his sword. After that, it was darkspawn galore. 

He could hear Hawke and Varric counting out each kill behind him, he would’ve kept track of his own, but after the fifth one he cut, it just became second nature. He didn’t stop until the head of the last darkspawn rolled at his feet. 

“I think that’s the last one,” he panted as he turned to face the others. He frowned when he saw four pairs of eyes staring at him with equal parts horror and awe. (The awe being on Hawke’s face weirdly enough)

He reached up to wipe the blood from his face, he’d forgotten how bad it smelled. 

“Uh, I could be wrong, but didn’t Blondie say darkspawn blood is bad?” Varric asked. 

“Only if you’re not a Warden,” Alistair said absentmindedly. 

“But you’re not a Warden...right?” Hawke asked. 

“Actually...I uh...I am,” Alistair answered. “It’s a long story…” 

“We’ve got time,” Carver said as he crossed his arms over his chest. 

“Carver,” Hawke replied. 

“No...no it’s okay, it was bound to come out sooner or later,” Alistair sighed. “I was conscripted by my...my mentor Duncan when I was younger, I was going to be a Templar, but Duncan thought I’d be better suited for the Wardens.” 

“But, most Warden’s died during the Blight, during the battle at Ostagar,” Hawke replied. 

“Yeah...yeah they did,” Alistair huffed. “All because fucking Loghain ignored our signal.” He kicked one of the darkspawn heads. “Innocent men and women, people I knew and trained with died because of that traitor. We got lucky, Amell and I, and we found the Grey Warden treaties and managed to get some allies, Zevran tried to kill us along the way, but well, that clearly failed and thank the Maker for that, and when we got to the Landsmeet, she...she spared his life. Even after he had us thrown in prison, ready to execute us, she spared his life, so I...I left. Zevran came with me, and if he hadn’t, I’d be drinking myself into an early grave.” 

“Well...shit,” Hawke rubbed the back of his neck. “...Is this why we didn’t see any Darkspawn on our way here? You were using your Warden sense to...sense them?” 

Alistair nodded. “I didn’t mean to lie, it’s just when we first got to Kirkwall, people thought the Warden’s had turned on King Cailin, I mean, some people still do really...so I thought it best to not say anything. I could just be another refugee…Can we just, find a way around the collapse in? The longer we stand here talking, the more darkspawn are gonna descend on us…” 

“He’s right,” Hawke nodded. “Come on guys.” 

Alistair started walking again and Carver fell into step next to him. The younger Hawke sibling said nothing but glanced in his direction briefly before keeping his eyes forward. 

_ Maybe Zevran will get bored and come after me… _ Alistair thought to himself. 


End file.
